Call me Mrs. Kardashian...

Hot Mama,

It's no secret that I am addicted to "Keeping Up with the Kardashians." And I do in fact, keep up with the crazy clan. In the most recent episode Kris is debating changing her name from Jenner back to Kardashian. Which naturally made me extremely upset, as I am a huge Bruce fan. And I think he puts up with so much from the women in that family, the ringleader of which is Kris. So she says that she thinks she should change it back because Kardashian has become a "brand." And as she says, "People already think I'm a Kardashian and call me Mrs. Kardashian."


I think the best part was the reaction from all of the girls when Kris told them. Both the Kardashian and Jenner girls couldn't believe the audacity of Kris. Kendall even went so far as to say, "How could you disrespect my Dad like that?" Which is so true! Who do you think you are Kris?! You are so lucky to have a wonderful and devoted husband who has put up with you and your shennanigans for 20 plus years. Not to mention that he RAISED the Kardashian children as his own! Such a sign of disrespect. And really is it worth the attention / fame / whatever she thought she would get out of this to emasculate her husband and on top of that really hurt his feelings? He's the one who goes to sleep with you every night, not the press, not the public, but him. I just couldn't even believe it. Then at the end of the episode she makes a big announcement at a family dinner that she feels bad about considering changing it to Kardashian and that she loves Bruce and that he's the best thing that ever happened to her. It's like, YA RIGHT, you just feel bad cause everyone guilted and shamed you and Khloe called you a "fame whore!"
-Eager "Call me Mrs. Jenner (Brody that is..)" Beaver

Eager Beaver,

Not much to say except that I agree with you 100 percent!! Shame on Kris and...Khloe has her mom pegged.
-Hot Mama

Why Doesn't Anyone Ever Tell You...???

Hot Mama,

I know, I know I am only in my twenties and I probably have no right to complain about this... but it's not just me, my roomie has totally made comments about this too. What is going on with our bodies? I seriously feel like my metabolism has just stopped. She and I both laugh at each other because we keep noticing all of these changes in our shape (and size!) I used to be able to hit the gym and drop any weight that I gained in a heartbeat. Now, I go on vacation for two weeks and gain 8lbs, and I come back and can't even lose the 8lbs in a full 8 weeks. WHAT IS THAT ABOUT!? It is so traumatizing. And to top it all off, I feel like I am getting to a point where I want to just give up. Is this common? Or are she and I both just lazy and need to make a change? It's not like we are gaining tons of weight or anything like that, but my body is just totally reflecting my lifestyle like it never did before. And to not be able to drop my vacay weight quickly has been such a blow. If I would've known before I left that it would be like this on my return, I would have put down my cheeseburger with bacon, avocado, fried onions, and a fried egg, and picked up a salad fork instead. UGH, this is too traumatic!
-Eager"WTF"Beaver

Beautiful Eager Beaver,

Welcome to womanhood. It always amazes me when other women look at girls in their late teens and early twenties and get discouraged! Soon enough those girls will be in their mid-twenties and everything will change. They will finally be in their women's bodies! You don't really know what your body is like until you hit this age. I've seen it happen again and again. Don't despair but this is now your "real" body, your other body was your girl body. Maturing aint all fun. And not to be a downer but wait until you hit my age and you gain another 8 pounds and can't get rid of that! And you're still remembering what your body was like at 22, 16 - 20 pounds ago, and thinking why is it so hard to get there? It's just life as a homosapien. And it's the same for men. It sucks for sure because there is nothing you can do about it except eat less and exercise more...a lot more. It's so true that you can't eat like you did just a year or two ago and that's the same for my age, it seems to happen overnight, it's awful! You can get rid of it, it's just not as easy as it once was! Or you can just enjoy your 25 year old body for another 25 years (because you're gorgeous just as you are) if you're not having kids, never mind about after a baby cuz that's a whole nother story, or figure out what works for you calorie and exercise wise to get your 19 year old body back NOW before life catches up with you again! The good news? Men seem to love us just the way we are at 19 or 49!
-Hot Mama

Money Matters...

Hot Mama,

Last night I was chatting with my best friend on line and out of the blue, he posed a question to me that really got me thinking. How much does money matter? I mean, I have less than no experience in this regard, so I have to defer to you on this one. And I know what I think, but I am just curious as to how you see it! I know you live a lot like I do, and I wonder with your ex-husband how things were for the two of you. Below is a piece of our conversation...

HIM: When you get married, would you want a joint bank account?
ME: haha depends, would I marry someone with more money than me, or less money than me?
HIM: um...less, but interesting side note
ME: So here is what I think, #1 I know the type of person that I am and how I am with my money. And it would be necessary for me to find a partner that feels the same way about money that I do. And #2 I like living well and enjoying my life. I am not a person who pinches pennies or saves every dime, and it would be hard for me to be with someone like that. I also couldn't justify everything that I buy, it would be too exhausting for me. That being said, I definitely wouldn't mind sharing my money. I would consider myself a very generous person, and I know that you can't take it with you, and I like sharing what I have. If my husband thought I was too frivilous spending money on clothes or what have you, then I would understand if he wanted to keep money separate. But to me, it's all about combining lives, and I would think that would be part of it... BUT I would also like a separate account on my own, because if I buy my hubby a gift, I'd want it to be from money I earned, not his or our joint account, because it's just not as special that way.

Did you and the ex-hubby have a joint account? Did you have an issue combining funds? And then I think now that you've been on your own for a few years and dealing with your own finances and financial issues, what would you do if you got married again? Is there a security in combining assets or a security in NOT combining assets? And I made a joke to him about depending on whether or not my man made less money to me, but I wonder if that would ever be a part of it. For someone my age I make a pretty decent salary, and the likelihood of me being with a man who makes less than I do, does in fact exist. I want to be idealistic and think that I could be in a great marriage where money wasn't a big issue, but I am not naive, and I know that is NEVER the case! And then, when kids come in to the picture, things just get even that more complicated!
-EagerBeaver

Eager Beaver,

Interesting that you bring up this topic as I have a friend who is going through a divorce right now and we were just discussing the issue of joint and his and her accounts. The couple operate as my ex and I did, we had a joint and separate accounts. Into the joint we put money for all necessary things such as food, rent, gas, water, phone, utilities, medical, etc. and we each had our own accounts for discretionary spending. In my ex-husband's and my case, we put it in as a percentage of our incomes because he made more than I did by a third to half. So it wouldn't really be equitable for me to have to put in half of the mortgage when I made so much less than him. In my friend's case, he is the bread winner and puts money into the joint account for all their mutual expenses plus some and now it's a sticky situation because it wasn't ever really "joint" as it was all of his money. Interestingly, experts agree with how my ex and I handled it and we didn't have a lot of signposts back in the day, it's just what made sense. Now, that's not to say that this prevented us from having money issues because it didn't. Especially when it came to saving and spending, do we "need" that muscle car (a classic 442 convertible Oldsmobile in tomato red) or a trip to Europe? And, you and I are alike, even back then I hated being told how to spend my money. In retrospect though, since money is one of the top two issues that dissolve marriages, I think that somehow swallowing your financial need for autonomy for the good of the union is paramount. I believe that you can the joint and separate but you need to have monthly or quarterly meetings on where you're at financially. It feels like being taken to task BUT if you're in it together for the long, long, long haul then you should plan for your future together. There was a couple we knew that did this and the wife would make fun of her husband for their "meetings", he had charts and everything, an engineer, but she sat down with him and did it. And they're still married! Even though they stopped having sex years and years ago because he's not sexually attracted to her anymore! And I'm not. So, the moral of this story is you can have it "your" way but be sure to have it "our" way too!
-Hot Mama